Let It Go – A Guide to Forgiving Offenses
Have you ever had anyone wrong you? If your answer is no, then you are not being very honest! Of course we’ve all been wronged at one time or another. Offenses are all around us – the building manager who acts more like a slum lord, the shop keeper who exploits a situation and price gouges, the husband or wife who abuses, the boss or co-worker who harasses, the schoolmate or office worker who bullies, the minister who intimidates and demands their way in a congregation, the friend who lies about us… The list could go on and on. Our world is full of people who offend. One only has to get on social media to experience a series of offenses. It seems we can say anything to anyone now-a-days. As Believers, we are to navigate this “new norm” in a different way. First, we are not to be the offenders, and second, we are to forgive those who come repenting for their offenses.
Vs 1-4 He said to His disciples, “Offenses will certainly come, but woe to the one they come through! It would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck and he were thrown into the sea than for him to cause one of these little ones to stumble. Be on your guard. If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him. And if he sins against you seven times in a day, and comes back to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him.”
In Luke 16, Jesus has just told the story about Lazarus and the rich man. He ends the story by saying, “If they don’t listen to Moses and the prophets, they will not be persuaded if someone rises from the dead.” This makes it even more crucial how we live. Do we show others Jesus? Are we allowing the Holy Spirit to work in and through us? Now, Jesus says to His disciples, “Offenses will certainly come, but woe to the one they come through! It would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck and he were thrown into the sea than for him to cause one of these little ones to stumble.” The Greek word for offenses is skandalon. It is a word meaning a stick for a bait or trap or a stumbling block. We are not to be a stumbling block for those who have come to Christ, yet there are those all around us who set up traps and hinder young believers. They spread false testimony or throw out false doctrine. They make it difficult to even be a Christian by slapping on extra things that must be done in order to “really” be a Christian. The Pharisees were notorious for adding “laws”, extra things the people had to do to follow God’s Law. They made their lives difficult. Matthew 23:1-4 says, Then Jesus spoke to the crowds and to His disciples: The scribes and the Pharisees are seated in the chair of Moses. Therefore do whatever they tell you, and observe it. But don’t do what they do, because they don’t practice what they teach. They tie up heavy loads that are hard to carry and put them on people’s shoulders, but they themselves aren’t willing to lift a finger to move them. Jesus says, there are going to be stumbling blocks – it’s inevitable – just don’t be the ones putting those stumbling blocks down – especially in front of the little ones, or those who are young in their faith. Jesus knew that those were new to the faith were going to be especially vulnerable to the teaching of the Word. They would follow the teacher and they would be an easy group to take advantage of. The people looked up to their Rabbi’s. They wanted to follow what was right. It is the same today. New believers want to follow the teachings of Jesus. They want to be righteous believers. Woe to those teachers and leaders who put stumbling blocks in their way. It would be better for them to die a horrible death, like putting a millstone (a large stone used to mill grain into flour) around their neck and being thrown into the sea!
Unfortunately, we find this behavior more often in today’s churches than we would like. I recently finished a book by Philip Yancey’s memoir entitled “Where The Light Fell”. The book tells of the many stumbling blocks he encountered throughout his childhood and life. He is a man who had so many stumbling blocks put in front of him, it’s a wonder he emerged into God’s amazing grace and light at all. Others in his life did not. When we are divisive, we are putting stumbling blocks in front of people. When we teach faulty and false doctrine, we are putting obstacles down that people can’t get around. When we espouse hate for others, be it racial, political, social economical, etc., then we are putting down unneeded barriers keeping others from hearing and following the gospel. Finally, when we are unforgiving of those who have repented, we put up a hurdle in front of those who are trying to follow Christ. And this is the next thing Jesus warns his disciples about.
Be on your guard. If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him. And if he sins against you seven times in a day, and comes back to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him.” People will sin against us. It is going to happen. Someone may say something against us or do something against us… Jesus says we are to rebuke them. The Greek word for rebuke is epitimaó. Interestingly, it means to honor, to censure and to warn. It is not a rebuke out of anger or bitterness, but a warning born out of love and honor for the person. The desire is for them to come back into fellowship, much like the shepherd returns the wandering lamb back into the fold. It is simply entreating the person to repent and ask forgiveness so you can forgive them. Jesus says, even if the person sins 7 times and repents 7 times in one day, you must aphiémi, a word meaning to release. You are literally to release them from their guilt or their sin against you. In the words of a song from the movie Frozen, Let It Go! And I think this is the tough part about what Jesus is telling us here. It’s easy to give lip service and say, yes I forgive you. It’s harder to let it go, to release it.
Vs 5-6 The apostles said to the Lord, “Increase our faith.” “If you have faith the size of a mustard seed,” the Lord said, “you can say to this mulberry tree, ‘Be uprooted and planted in the sea,’ and it will obey you.
The apostles response to this teaching – increase our faith! This teaching was so hard, they knew they needed more faith to carry it out. To release offense after offense in people is difficult. It takes a great amount of obedience and faith to do so. It’s so much easier to have those offenses in our “back pocket”, to take out, especially if the person messes up again. It would be like using a permanent marker on a dry erase board. It can’t be wiped away. Jesus tells them it takes faith the size of a mustard seed – a very small seed – and you can say to a mulberry tree, be uprooted and cast into the sea. I’m not sure how deep the roots of a mulberry tree are, but I have one in my front yard and it is quite the nuisance. I have tried to cut it down and dig it up to no avail. It just keeps coming back! For me, this is a good illustration of how those little sins against us can be. I can try to get rid of it, release it, put it away, but the offense keeps coming back into my mind. It is only when I take my little mustard seed sized faith and put it into the hands of an Almighty, Great Big God, that I can truly let it go. His grace and His light will take it to the sea.
Vs 7-10 “Which one of you having a slave tending sheep or plowing will say to him when he comes in from the field, ‘Come at once and sit down to eat’? Instead, will he not tell him, ‘Prepare something for me to eat, get ready, and serve me while I eat and drink; later you can eat and drink’? Does he thank that slave because he did what was commanded? In the same way, when you have done all that you were commanded, you should say, ‘We are good-for-nothing slaves; we’ve only done our duty.’”
This small little parable seems a bit harsh to our 21st century minds. Why shouldn’t the master thank the servant for doing such hard work and serve him/her? Aren’t we at least entitled to a little appreciation? As servants, if we only do what we’ve been asked to do then no, we should not expect praise. We’ve only done our basic duty. We’ve only done the work assigned to us. Does the teacher make a huge deal because the student actually did the homework? Does the boss say, wow, amazing, you did your job? Does the parent gush because the child did their assigned chores? Not only that, taken to the extreme, the student is now expecting the teacher to do their homework for them because they showed up to school. I don’t think so! Let’s put this parable into proper perspective. The master is God and we are the servants. We have been given work to do. Should we expect praise from God? No, we should be the ones praising Him. Should God Almighty exalt us for doing His work? No, we should be exalting Him instead. He is the One who deserves our praise and our thanks, not the other way around. It would be like the potter saying to the cup they just created, ”You’re a cup and you hold water – WOW!! No, the cup is only doing what it was created to do. The potter expects the cup to hold water, just as the student, the worker and the child are expected to do what the teacher, boss, and parent asks. God has asked us to live a life of faith in Him. He is asking us not to put stumbling blocks in front of other believers. He expects us to forgive them when they come in repentance to us. This is our “job description” as Believers. When our hearts are right, we understand our walk with God as a privilege, not something to be praised for. As we grow, we discover, as John the Baptist did when responding to a dispute as to who to follow, “No one can receive a single thing unless it’s given to him from heaven. You yourselves can testify that I said, ‘I am not the Messiah, but I’ve been sent ahead of Him.’ He who has the bride is the groom. But the groom’s friend, who stands by and listens for him, rejoices greatly at the groom’s voice. So this joy of mine is complete. He must increase, but I must decrease.”
Vs 11-19 While traveling to Jerusalem, He passed between Samaria and Galilee. As He entered a village, 10 men with serious skin diseases met Him. They stood at a distance and raised their voices, saying, “Jesus, Master, have mercy on us!” When He saw them, He told them, “Go and show yourselves to the priests.” And while they were going, they were healed. But one of them, seeing that he was healed, returned and, with a loud voice, gave glory to God. He fell face down at His feet, thanking Him. And he was a Samaritan. Then Jesus said, “Were not 10 cleansed? Where are the nine? Didn’t any return to give glory to God except this foreigner?” And He told him, “Get up and go on your way. Your faith has made you well.”
After this, Jesus begins his travel to Jerusalem going a particular way – between Samaria (the land Jews despised) and Galilee. As He is entering a village His met by 10 men with serious skin diseases. They have been declared unclean and had to stay outside the village and depend on the grace of others for food and water. They had to yell out to keep people away from them as they could be contagious. They were outcasts – offensive you could say. They were a mix of Jew and Samaritan, held together by their common anguish and despair. Forgotten is the animosity. You might say, they were all equally offensive. Suddenly, they see Jesus and hope arises. They call out to Him, hoping He will pay attention and give them mercy. They all know if He would just turn their way, healing would not be far away. And Jesus does look their way – offensive as they were. He sees their faith and says to them, “Go and show yourselves to the priests.” The faith He sees is now going to be tested. Will they go, or will they desire something more? Do they believe, or will they require proof? It is the master in the parable telling the servant to go. They had to obey as unhealed men: And while they were going, they were healed. Each turned in faith and began to run. As they responded in faith, they were healed.
As amazing as this was, something even more astounding happened. When one of the men saw he had been healed, he came back to thank the One who had done the healing. He didn’t say, I knew my faith would work, look how great I am. God should be oh so pleased by my faith. No, he came to the source of his healing and praised the master who had told him to go. But I want to make very clear – that wasn’t the astounding thing. Jesus is not astounded by the one came back, He is astounded that the other nine didn’t come back. Yes, they had great faith and were healed, but they were like the servants in the parable who expected to be served when they came in from the fields. Only one, and it was a Samaritan, understood the gift of mercy given him. Only one knew he didn’t deserve to be served and came back to the master to praise and thank him. He is the embodiment of the servant who continues to do what the master says, not expecting praise for his obedience. And notice, he didn’t get praise for his obedience. Jesus didn’t say – wow, thank you so much for coming back and acknowledging me. He didn’t say – you are a man of such great faith and an example to all. No, Jesus said, where are the other nine? Why aren’t they here? The expected response was thankfulness and praise. Yes, all ten were healed because of their faith, but only one understood who he was – a servant.
And that is who we are. We are servants of the most high God. In this passage, he is giving us some pretty explicit instructions. First, don’t be a stumbling block to other believers. Second, when another believer does something offensive to you, go to them and rebuke them, not out of anger or bitterness, but with love born out of a desire to honor them, wanting to see them repent and come back into the fold. Third, when they do repent, forgive them. Let it go. Do not put their wrong in a ledger to be taken out for the next time. Use the dry erase marker so you can easily wipe it away. Fourth, have faith, even if it is as small as a mustard seed, and put that faith in His hands, allowing Him to do what He will with us. When we are obedient, we will find amazing things being done. Fifth, then come back to Him and give Him all the praise and glory for working through us to see the kingdom of God expand throughout the earth. Acknowledge He is the master and we are the servant. Zechariah 4:6-7 reminds us, This is the word of the Lord to Zerubbabel: ‘Not by strength or by might, but by My Spirit,’ says the Lord of Hosts. ‘What are you, great mountain? Before Zerubbabel you will become a plain. And he will bring out the capstone accompanied by shouts of: Grace, grace to it!’” We are the servants who have been asked to do what God wants us to do. It is not by our might and not by our power that they are done. It is by God’s Spirit and He is the One to receive all glory, honor and thanks!
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